Natural Disasters

As you may have heard from the news, today there was an earthquake in Southern California, and because of this, I can now say that I have indeed experienced an earthquake.

Ok. So, maybe the quake was SO weak and short lived where I live that I actually had myself convinced that I had knocked into my TV table and its rocking caused the chair I was sitting on to also rock beneath me. It's just that it happened too quickly and I was by myself so I had no one to affirm what I had felt.. so I just kind of shrugged it off as... "that was weird".

It wasn't until about 30 minutes later on facebook that I noticed friends writing about surviving the earthquake that I realized what I had experienced had NOT been some strange figment of my imagination... it was an EARTHQUAKE!

Yes, it's true, there's not much to my earthquake story. The only reason why I am writing about it now is to proclaim that I have in my past 4 years as a military wife experienced most (if not all) of the natural disasters the United States has to offer.

I was living in the Panhandle of Florida 3 years ago when Hurricane Dennis caused my husband me, our two dogs, and one that we were dog sitting to evacuate our home. I was even there when Katrina tore through Mississippi and Louisiana. Sure, Katrina to me was not much more than strong winds, rain, and the threat of tornadoes.. but the after effects of Katrina.. the devastation.. the fuel shortages.. were all very real to us living only 30 miles from the center of the storm.

And, of course, last year.. there were the Southern California wildfires that had me out of my home and more scared than I can ever remember.. but I won't go into that since if you scroll back in my blogs you can read all about THAT experience.

Oh, and of course.. I grew up in Pennsylvania and did experience one or two blizzards in my day.. even though.. I remember blizzards as nothing more than hot chocolate, cinnamon buns, days off school, jumping off the deck, and taking the unexpected vacation to paint the living room!!!

So, now I've mentioned earthquakes, hurricanes, (the threat of) tornadoes (as a direct result of the hurricanes), wildfires, and blizzards.

I don't know about you, but I'm thinking maybe I should invest in some flood insurance. What do you think?!

:)

Maybe, Just Maybe

The countdown is really on now for D Day. Hubby's going away party has come and gone. Our last visitor has packed his bags and gotten on the plane for home. There's nothing left to look forward to.. except the countdown.. the last moments.. the waiting.

Have you ever had the hiccups... and when they go away you think you might still need to hiccup for the next couple minutes but no hiccups come out? And then you find yourself constantly checking whether you're going to hiccup or not? Well, this may very well be the WORST example ever.. but that's kind of how I feel right now. I keep doing these checks on myself. Every now and then I stop what I'm doing and do a check.. am I OK now? Am I STILL OK?! BUT WIAT, am I REALLy OK?! and the answer so far has been pretty much unequivocally, yes.

I'm fine.

Just like with hiccups.. after they go away and you're expecting one to come out at any second... it's a bit offputting that despite the fact that I keep expecting some kind of breakdown.. it isn't happening.

Maybe this deployment will be completely different. Maybe it really will be 10x easier than the last. I mean, Even since Hubby has been home I have grown accustomed to 2 week, 4 week, 1 week etc. absences. Maybe when deployment day comes.. I'll hug Hubby goodbye and something inside of myself will NOT fall apart. Maybe this goodbye will be just like all the many goodbyes we've had over the past few months.

I don't know.

All I know is that for now, I'm holding up firmly.

It helps that two weeks after Hubby leaves my parents will arrive in town.. and I know that any loose ends that Hubby leaves behind my parents will be sure to tie up nice and neatly before they go back to the East Coast. I know that by the time September arrives and the school year starts, my life will be neatly in order and once school gets going I won't have very much time to dwell on missing Hubby.. I will be too busy surviving.

So. Maybe, just maybe this deployment won't rip my life apart the way the last one did. Maybe, just maybe this one will be very different.

Here's to the hope of maybe.

:)

Temper Tantrums

When I was in college I used to babysit this 3-year-old girl on Friday nights who threw temper tantrums that should have gone down in the record books. These temper tantrums were full throttle..she must have used every ounce of energy she had left inside of her to crawl screaming around her entire downstairs for 30 minutes.. while slobbering everywhere. I can only imagine that the time that she SCREAMED at the top of her lungs for 45 minutes while in her highchair at dinner she must have done some damage to her vocal chords.. But, I'll tell you what, that girl was committed. Her temper tantrums were absolutely amazing.

and.. today and a little bit yesterday and for a few moments last week... I really felt like I wanted to be like that little girl and scream at the top of my lungs.. slobber all over the floor.. and throw myself around my house. For some reason I think that girl must've been onto something. Throwing a temper tantrum like that must really relieve a lot of frustration and anger. Not only that, but after 30 minutes of screaming and rolling around on the floor.. it seems to me that you'd have to be too tired to remember what upset you in the first place.

With hubby's deployment looming ahead of me and a going away party that seems to be crashing and burning in my face,who knows.. it is possible that I just might find myself rolling around my living room floor one afternoon screaming at the top of my lungs. I can't make any promises that it won't happen.. that's all I'm going to say.

:)

happy and sad

Right now I am very happy and very sad at the same time. I did the inevitable today and actually glanced at a calendar. It was one of the scariest things I've ever forced myself to do.. especially when I realized that time with hubby is numbered to less than two weeks now.

I'm starting to feel a little bit like the person I was last March when he left for his first deployment....you know.. the person who is so overwhelmed with what's going on that life begins to feel a bit like a fog.. and the fact that I'm still functioning as a normal human is somewhat of a miracle.

But.. I'm happy. Hubby and I have been spending some great quality time together lately.. we're happier than ever...Life is good! Well, life is GREAT except for the fact that in less than two weeks I will be suffering through my own form of self-torture (aka DEPLOYMENT).

hmm.

This Saturday we finally took our jet ski out.. and.. IT WAS SO MUCH FUN that we went back again on Sunday! We found this GREAT lake about 30 minutes away from our house that allows jetskis on the weekends. The lake was HUGE with tons of little beach areas all around that you can beach on and hang out on between jetskiing. Both times we went we took some buddies along with us.. our jetski only holds two but we have the coolest raft for two that the jetski drags behind. Riding the raft was a mixture of the most fun you've ever had AND fearing for your life as you bounce around the lake. The best thing, in my opinion, was beaching on the side of the lake and laying on the raft. Pure heaven on earth.

Tomorrow we will probably go to Disneyland and finally make use of the tickets my students gave me for an end-of-the-year present.

Hmm.. So, can you understand how I say that right now I am So very happy and so very sad at the same time? On the bright side, though.. happy and sad together sure beats the hell out of sad all on its own. :)

Bearing Witness

Despite the fact that I have 8,000 things to do in preparation for my long departure from my home (first I'll be heading to PA/MD to see my parents, attend a longtime friend's wedding, enjoy my nephew, and spend time with my sister THEN, I'll be heading to FL to relax on the beach with hubby and the in-laws), I am having a bit of a slow start to my day. I'm recovering from 3 days of intensity and learning. The past 3 days I attended a conference for Catholic School Teachers called Bearing Witness sponsored by the Anti Defamation League.

I wish I had the ability to fully explain the incredible amount of information and understanding that was pounded into me in the course of those 3 days. While I was there, I couldn't help thinking that I wished my husband or mother or sister.. or SOMEONE that I loved and cared about could be sharing this experience with me. Because, that's what it was... an experience.

Rather than coming out with facts & statistics.. I have come out with a deep understanding of the anti-semitic problem in the world and in the Catholic church. Deep understanding is correct, because it is all so much deeper than probably anyone can possibly imagine (it is certainly deeper than I had ever considered..and I DO consider myself to have always been very sensitive to these things). And, now, I face the difficult task of somehow passing that UNDERSTANDING on to my students. Task is probably the wrong word... responsibility is what it is. Now that I have an understanding, I have an absolute RESPONSIBILITY to live what I know.. and to pass it on to my students..

The first two days were not spent educating us on the problem of anti-semitism. In fact, they were simply spent informing us about the Jewish Religion and the Catholic Religion. During this portion of the conference I met my new inspiration. His name is Father McManus and he is by far the most inspirational and captivating teacher I have ever had the opportunity to meet and learn from. When he spoke, I actually found myself sitting on the very edge of my seat.. with my mouth hanging open.. ready to ingest the pearls of wisdom he was sending my way. He was amazing, and if for any reason you ever have the opportunity to hear him speak, I insist that you go.

I signed up for Bearing Witness thinking that I would learn a lot. But, Bearing Witness was so much more than knowledge and information. Bearing witness was a life changing event in my life that I hope I will never forget.

MONEY!

After the hellishness of this school year, I think my principal realized I was doing a lot more work than I was being compensated for. I think that's the only explanation for the fact that according to the pay schedule set forth by my employer I was only supposed to receive about an $800 dollar raise next year. But, when I received my contract draft to look over and initial, I was SHOCKED to see that instead of an $800 raise for next year.. I was going to receive a $6000 raise.

Being the MORAL person that I am and realizing the likelihood that this was not some amazing gift, but rather, a mistake.. when I turned my draft contract back to my principal, I added a sticky note next the the amount that said, "Is this amount right? I'm certainly NOT complaining, but it just seems like a big jump, so I want to be sure." --

I didn't hear anything back from my principal. And, when I received the final draft of my contract back in an envelope on my desk.. I opened it up and on top of the amount was a sticky note with a smiley face.

Sure enough. I am getting a $6000 raise next year! Woo Hoo!

I still don't know why. I can only guess at my principal's motives. Possibly she realized I am doing more work than my pay schedule dictates. Perhaps she's just tired of having to deal with the "time cards" I had to fill out this year (because I was barely making minimum wage compared to how many hours I was working!!!). Perhaps, she was afraid that after seeing me at the job fair this year , I would be seeking greener pastures and this was how she was getting me to stay. Who knows.

I guess what she was thinking when she gave me the raise really doesn't matter. All that matters is, How Will I Spend the EXTRA $$$??!!

JUST KIDDING, MOM!

This year & this deployment will be a super money saving time for hubby and me. We do, afterall, plan to start a family a few months after hubby returns from Iraq. That's the plan anyway. :O)

My Sister

This morning on my way to work, I started thinking about my sister. I was thinking about a blog she had written recently where she said she constantly composes things in her head, and whether they ever get written down or not, it is the way that she sorts through her thoughts. When she said this, I realized that I do the same thing ALL THE TIME. My thoughts went from that to actually composing a blog in my head ABOUT my sister. I decided that when I got home today, I would sit down and put this blog into action.

The FUNNY thing is that when I got home, I read this blog that she had written today requesting that people (specifically me) write a list of our top ten adjectives to describe her.

Well, sister dear, I will do better than ten adjectives. I will do an entire blog.

Since I just wrote about our weird connection, I'll tell you that this blogging incident was not the first time that this kind of thing has happened to us. Often, in the past, I have received a phone call from my sister just as I was considering picking up the phone and calling her (and, no, we do NOT call each other every day.. or even every week.. so yes this is quite something!).

But, probably the strangest thing that has ever happened was the day that she was giving birth. My parents and I were sitting in the Main Hospital Waiting Room waiting for a phone call from her hubby letting us know that BABY had been born. My Sister had been in labor since the night before, so we really had NO idea when the baby would finally arrive. As we were sitting there.. I suddenly had the strangest feeling come over me that caused me to physically suck in my breath. I told my mom what had happened and how strange it was. We looked at the time because I said SIS had probably just had her baby......... an HOUR later we finally received the call to come up to the maternity ward to see Mama and baby. The first thing I inquired about was the TIME of birth.. and sure enough.. it was exactly ONE minute after I had my strange feeling..

My sister.

When we were young, she was the definition of the mean older sister. When I look back on my childhood diary, I have numerous entries complaining about how mean she was. Her evil sister acts that top the charts of my memory are 1) Hitting me in the face with her jeans one evening at the dinner table (don't ask) and 2) taking the heads off all of my barbies, distributing them around my room, placing tiny tin foil knives in their hands, and telling me that they come alive at night and kill people. Terrible, right?

Despite her evil ways (according to my diary), I know that my sister was a big reason why I was able to look in the mirror and STOP seeing a tall, awkward, skinny, pale, freckly, dry skinned, dull haired girl as a teenager. My sister told me that I was beautiful more times than I could possibly count. She said it so much, that at one point or another, I began to believe her. She, also, was the one who told me I was a good writer. She always complimented me on what a good writer I was and encouraged me to write! (and, the funny thing is.. all along SHE was probably always the best writer in the family.. but chose to keep that gift undertabs)!

AND, believe it or not, she is the one who helped me to realize that I should be a teacher. I'll never forget it. We were at the beach with our family the summer after my freshman year in college. I was still an Undecided major. We were at the bookstore choosing some beach reading, and I (as usual) headed straight for the children's section (teenagers). She came and found me there and said.. "You know, Sarah, you like these books so much.. why don't you major in education and teach Jr. High English?!" And just like that... it was a done deal. She was right, and as soon as she said it, I knew it was what I should do.

My sister.

How could I possibly choose just ten adjectives when she is much more than that to me. To me.. my sister is:

- Ambition in action.. she doesn't just wish and hope to do things.. she does them.

- Beauty inside and out.. she is a GOOD person with GOOD intentions always

- The person I will look to for guidance when I am a mother (because as far as I can tell.. she is the BEST (mother)).

- One who doesn't accept mediocrity in herself OR others

- Silent Laughter (When we are together we almost always find something to be SO funny that when we laugh.. we laugh SO HARD that noise doesn't come out!)

- KNOWLEDGE (when I have a question about religion, politics, the world, or life in general.. I know she will have the answer I need)

- Thoughtfulness.. (She has (all of my adult life) sent me notes and letters just to say "good job", "congratulations" , "I'm thinking of you", or simply "Hello"! AND, unlike Me.. she never forgets a birthday.

- Strength... (and I don't say this b/c she's a brown belt in Tae Kwon Do and once flipped me!) I say this because she looks life square in the face and overcomes any obstacle that comes her way.

To give you an idea of who my sister is... when she was sick and in the hospital.. and they didn't know what was wrong.. but thought that it was cancer.... when I talked to her on the phone.. she would try to cheer me up and make things easier one me. Crazy that she would be thinking about my feelings when she was going through something like that.. But, that's her.

And, if you still don't feel like you've gotten the message about my sister.. I'll leave you with this final tidbit.

My sister... is probably the only person who can claim that she injured her back while attempting to carry her little sister to bed one night. (When I was 19!!! And she was 25!!!) :)))

Now, SIS. I think Lucas is right; because, if THAT doesn't qualify you as silly then I don't know what does.