Bizarre

One of the teachers at my school dislikes me, and I have absolutely no idea why.

Now, normally, I absolutely HATE it when people hate me. But, somehow, in this case, it doesn't bug me so much. I just really think it is absolutely totally and completely bizarre.

The thing about it is, it took me almost an entire school year to realize it. Because, she's not mean to me. I mean, how can someone be mean when they literally do not acknowledge my existence. That's what she does. She ignores me.

I guess the reason it took me so long to notice is because she wasn't being snotty or unkind. She wasn't being anything. I just assumed she was that way with everyone.

Then, at some point, the realization slowly began to dawn on me that she absolutely is not that way with everyone. In fact, with everyone else she is very friendly. She greets the other teachers with a bright smile and a pleasant, "Good Morning!"

But me? She doesn't even look at me. It's weird, because even now, 3 years later, every single time I see her, I will look at her prepared to smile and give her my greeting. But.. she doesn't even look my way. It's as if I am invisible.

The times when I have actually spoken a greeting or a farewell (despite her lack of eye-contact or visible awareness of my presence) to her, she has responded a dead-pan almost whisper, "hello". Nothing like the bright smile and vibrant greeting I have witnessed her giving the other teachers at the school.

It's possible that you may be doubting me on this, and that's okay, because I have doubted myself as well. In fact, on multiple occasions I have convinced myself that I am crazy - that there is no way this woman is singling me out and treating me differently than she treats everyone else at the school.

Recently, I had decided that possibly it was just that we didn't really have anything in common. She teaches 2nd grade; I teach jr. high. I'm a good 15 years younger than she is. She's probably my polar opposite as far as personalities go. Possibly, I told myself, she doesn't dislike me. Possibly, it's just that we don't know each other very well, and she's uncomfortable around me. Possibly.

Well, that theory flew right out the window when the new teacher arrived. The-teacher-who-ignores has literally gone out of her way to befriend the new teacher. It just doesn't make any sense. The new teacher is younger than me. Her personality is not similar to the-teacher-who-ignores. And, she, also, teaches jr. high.

Recently, in the lunchroom, the-teacher-who-ignores actually spoke to me. She was asking me for the 8th graders' song choice for our Christmas sing-a-long since she is in charge of it. But, hey, I mean, she looked me dead in the eye and spoke to me. I nearly collapsed from the shock.

After that, I thought we had made some progress. I thought after her acknowledgement of my presence in the world we might soon graduate to sincere greetings and farewells. I thought wrong.

Which leads me to the incident that got me to write this blog.

This afternoon, the new teacher and I were in the teacher work-room discussing our confusion about an upcoming event at the school. The teacher-who-ignores walked in and was present for a good portion of our conversation. Let's just say she was there long enough to understand that both the new teacher and I were confused about the upcoming event. But, when she jumped into the conversation to clarify things, she was clearly speaking only to the new teacher.

Have you ever been standing in a group of people and had someone come into the group and stand in front of you, boxing you out of the conversation? I don't know how she managed it, but that's basically what she did to me this afternoon.


I'm not even upset. I don't even care that she dislikes me. At this point, I just really want to know why. Obviously, I have wronged her in some way. Clearly, I have done something to this woman, something that I am genuinely unaware of.

Bizarre.

Must See TV

I might have to revoke my previous statement about The Biggest Loser not being my number one favorite tv show.

I just got finished watching my dvr-ed episode of the show for this week and HOLY HANNAH!
I didn't just cry; I sobbed. Like a freaking baby.

I no longer suggest, but rather, demand that you go to this link and watch the latest episode. (Hint: make sure you click on full episodes and not something else. When I first went into the site, somehow I managed to click 2 minute recap instead. It was rather frustrating.)

If you can make it through with dry eyes, I don't think I can be your friend... because you're not a human being.

powerful stuff.

Note: The episode is 2 hours long, so pop some popcorn and kick back because you're in it for the long haul. It takes a good half an episode to get to the sob-evoking stuff, so hang in there. It will be worth it; I swear.

The Sense of Humor of an 8th Grader

The best part of my days is interacting with my students. I honestly can't express to you the joy that they bring to my life.

So far this week, I have literally been in tears from laughing several times. And it's only Wednesday.

The things that have had me in hysterics consisted of one of my 8th graders (Eric) presenting his independent reading project to the class (The project is called Parade of Characters, and the students dress up as the main character in the novel they are reading and talk to us as though they are that character). Well, this kid went above and beyond. He had the entire class in hysterics! For the entire day, I would have random flashes of his presentation and find myself giggling about it again. Awesome. (oh, and doubly awesome, after school today another student came to me and was asking if I had the book Eric had presented in my classroom library. Apparently, he was interested in reading it. How do you spell V-I-C-T-O-R-Y!) *sorry, I am drawing a terrible blank on the title, otherwise I'd give it to you.

Then, of course, there was the fundraising kick-off assembly where students were chosen at random to be part of a cookie eating contest. One of my otherwise shy 8th graders got up there and when asked his name responded, "Jim." (His name's Matthew). I laughed so hard; I cried. Jim?! What in the world would have posessed him to say that? The best part was that the guy in charge was not from our school and continually referred to Matt as Jim. He had no idea, and I think everyone was laughing too hard to bother to correct him.


And then there was this afternoon, when I was in my classroom grading papers. A graduate of my last year's 8th grade class and a current 8th grader generally hang out in my classroom on Wednesday afternoons while they wait for their sisters to finish volleyball practice. They were chatting, and I was grading papers. At one point in the conversation, the graduate (Josh) said to the 8th grader (Matt, a different Matt), "Can you say the months backwards?"

The interaction that ensued went something like this..
Matt: t thonths
Josh: what?
Matt: tuuu uthmonths
Josh: can you say the months backwards?
Matt: het thonms
Josh: silent, confused pause
Mrs. (Sorry): HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAH!

(Interpretation: Matt was trying to actually say THE MONTHS backwards, and Josh had no idea what the confusion was. He was patiently waiting for Matt to start saying: January, December, November, October, September, August, July, June, May, April, March, February)

As soon as my laughter broke into the conversation, they both figured out what had just happened and joined in with me. We had a nice little stomach grabbing, eye-misting laugh over the whole thing, and then Matt immediately swore me to secrecy.

Well, don't you worry, Matt. Your secret's safe with me.... and the world wide web.

I guess you could probably say that in some ways I have the sense of humor of an 8th grader. I mean, with the excitement I've been feeling every time a New Moon trailer comes on tv, I certainly feel like an 8th grader. I suppose there could be worse things, though, right? At least this way, one thing I can say for sure is that these kids are keeping me young.


**Add on: The book that my student presented was The Greatest Salesman in the World

News

Today I arrived home to a news story that knocked the breath out of me.

I don't know if you've heard or not, but yesterday was an especially fatal day in Afghanistan for our US troops. One of those deaths is hitting exceptionally close to home for me, though.

A good friend of a good friend of mine died. A helicopter pilot. A Marine Corps helicopter pilot. A Marine Corps Helicopter Pilot who is a Captain. A Marine Corps helicopter pilot who is a Captain who has a one-year-old child and a wife only 2 weeks from delivering their second child.

Is it sick that my gut reaction upon hearing this news was, "Thank God that wasn't my Marine."

Which led me to think, "Ohmygod... that could have been my Marine."

Which led me to think, "I am sick with sadness for the wife this Marine has left behind."

I don't know Captain Kyle R. VanDeGiesen or his wife. I know someone who knows them. But, even if I didn't know someone who knows them, I think this story would still have struck a little bit too close to home for me.

It's the realization that my absolute worst nightmare has turned into this family's reality.

My heart and prayers go out to this family.

And,
Today I feel a little bit more thankful for what I have, and a little bit more aware of how fragile what I have really is.

Primetime Therapy

I have found a new favorite show. Ok, so not top favorite, but it definitely ranks up there.

Something you should know about me is that I love books, movies, and tv shows for their ability to make me laugh or make me cry. I'm not talking a chuckle here or there or a misting of the eyes, I'm talking extreme emotion. Hysterical laughter or waterworks. In order to be great literature, fantastic cinema, or incredible tv it has to evoke one of these extreme emotions in me.

My go-to tearjerker shows have always been Oprah and Grey's Anatomy. Now I'd like to add The Biggest Loser to that list.

A couple of my good friends out here in So Cal are devoted viewers of the show. I remember one particular day (last season) when my friends were talking about how the people on the show ran a marathon. I was impressed.

I decided to start dvr-ing the show to watch during my evening elliptical routine. I figured it would be a motivator.

Well, the show never quite made it to my elliptical routine, because I've just been too darn busy crying my eyes out to exercise!

Tonight, for example, I can honestly tell you that I was literally on the verge of tears/in tears the entire (2 hour!) episode.

I find the tears to be therapeautic. I highly recommend it, especially after a long, stressful week.

The Flu (Part 2)

I currently have a free period at school, and I just walked into the teacher's workroom (which also happens to have a small room for the sick kids).

It took a few too many seconds for my brain to register what I had just walked into. The school secretary was dialing the phone, a flushed 2nd grader was standing by her side, and a smell.... something familiar.... was flooding my nose.

Oh my God, I realized with a gag. It's puke. That child just puked.

I turned around, walked out, tried to convince myself not to vomit, and went immediately to the bathroom to cleanse myself of whatever germs I had just encountered.

Ugh.

The Flu

Am I the only one who is totally freaking out about this whole swine flu thing?

Because I am. Totally Freaking Out.

It's made its way into my school, and I am not at all okay with it.

The other day, one of my 6th graders walked into the classroom, and I only had to look at him to see that he was SICK. I was terribly distracted by this fact. I kept asking him if he was OK. He kept saying he was fine. Except, he really wasn't. That much was obvious.

Finally, I told him he had to go to the office. He said he had already been there. I asked him if they had let him call home. He said he had called home, but his dad told him to stay at school.

I was appalled, and I'm sure I didn't mask it very well. I told him to go again and to tell his dad his teacher said he needed to go home.

Apparently, when he went to the office the second time, his temperature was 102.5.
Like I said... sick.

Kids are dropping like flies, and I am enforcing hand washing, hand sanitizing, and desk sanitizing like a wild woman.

My only hope is that due to my overexposure to all these germs, I might be more resistant to them than your average joe. Because, we're in for a long flu season, folks, and I can tell you right now that I do not want to be the flu's next victim.