Sad

The father of one of my students died last week. It was sudden and unexpected and incredibly tragic. He was 40 something. All I knew was that he had been alive the night before and never woke up the next morning. I assumed heart attack.

Today was the funeral. Due to the crowd, I ended up in the front of the church, to the side of the altar, where the choir used to sit to perform. In my perfect line of vision was the mourning family, including the 7th grade young man who is my student. I tried not to look at them; because their grief was almost too much for me to bear.

After the funeral I found out that this man had committed suicide. It knocked the breath out of me.

At the end of the day I was conducting meetings with my 8th grade students. It's something I'm doing to better reach each student and to find out where he or she is coming from. We just talk about how they feel about school, parents, extra-curricular activities, what they like to do with their time.. etc. So far, it's been great. Today my meeting was with a boy who has very obviously been having some emotional problems. We were talking about this, and he told me that he has been contemplating suicide.

My heart broke.

On my drive home I just kept thinking of the sadness of my two students.

This was a sad day.

But,

maybe now I know why I am a teacher. I hope I can help my students. I know I can at the very least try my best.