Deployment thoughts of a military wife..

Well..

Deployment day has come and gone. The preparation for deployment is over and now the waiting has begun. The goodbye was not terrible. Sad. Lonely. A little bit depressing, yes. But, not terrible. I'm really happy with the Team of people my husband will be over there with. They're good people.. & good marines.. I know they will take care of each other.

So, hubby is in good hands.

As for me.. well.. I'm settling into my life alone. I'm hating every second of it currently.. and as I was driving home from the grocery stores this afternoon I finally figured out what is WORSE about this deployment than last deployment.

Last deployment everything was new... and overwhelming.. and scary. There was always the question of.. will I make it through this? Am I actually strong enough to do this? And this uncertainty of my strength and what the future would bring in a strange way actually pushed me forward to be strong and succeed. This deployment, like I've said.. I already KNOW that I will be OK. I already know what it's like to live this life alone for 7 months.. I already KNOW hubby and I can survive 7 months of life apart.

So instead of spending the first several months just focused on survival... the only feeling I have inside me currently is absolute total and complete DREAD. I dread the next 7 months. I pray that they will be fast and smoothe.. but I dread that they will be slow and bumpy.

*ugh.

Deployment.. I hate you!

I think I should just title my blog this from now on

because I know that for the duration of 7 months.. pretty much all I will write about will be deployment...

Happy Reading.

:)