How NOT to Parent

As a two year teacher who just survived parent teacher conferences, and despite the fact that I do not have any children of my own, I feel certain that I could write a best selling book called How NOT to Parent.

Rule # 1: NEVER tell your child that he/she ALWAYS disappoints you. I would assume that this one was rather self-explanatory, but apparently not considering the amount of parents who made this statement to their children after seeing a less than satisfactory report card during parent teacher conferences.

Rule # 2: Do NOT be the parent who questions what the teacher is telling you because your child has told you differently. Of COURSE your child is telling you differently!! He/She is DESPERATELY afraid of losing his/her IPOD/XBOX/LAPTOP/IPHONE and would say and do anything to keep them!

Rule # 3: Do NOT be the parent who asks the teacher what you should do about your child's behavior problems. If YOU as the parent can't figure your kid out then that's 75% of your kid's problem in the first place. A Teacher can do many things, but he/she cannot teach you how to be a competent parent.

Rule # 4: Do NOT be the parent who allows your child to have a tv/cell phone/computer in his/her room and then complains that he/she does not do his/her homework when he/she is supposed to. OF COURSE your child isn't doing his/her homework. TV/CELL PHONES/COMPUTERS are WAY more fun than homework!!

Rule # 5: Do NOT be the parent who walks into the parent teacher conference and has no idea what subject the teacher teaches or what his/her name is. Come on people. Have you no shame?!

If you follow these rules very closely, you will be an expert in how NOT to parent. How TO parent is another matter indeed. I guess I'll figure that one out for myself when I have some kids of my own.

:)