...BUT

...but then again. We've put so much into this life, how do we possibly just walk away? I was walking past the really nice houses on base and saw a Marine in the front yard playing with his kids. My first thought was, "Dang. He looks young." My second thought was, "He's probably just a Major, that's why."

One year. We're one measly year from *those houses. From *that status. From *guaranteed retirement and financial security. How do we just walk away without knowing for sure whether that life was possible for us?

Clearly I am very torn.

We would have just approximately 10 years left in the good old USMC if they let us stick around. My dad turned 65 yesterday. He will be 75 when it's time for Mike to retire. In those 10 years, who knows where we could be. We could be sent to Japan. Hawaii. Back to California. Places far far away, and my kids could grow up the first decade of their lives hardly ever seeing their grandparents... and then when we finally move back? Those grandparents will be older than I ever want to believe that they will actually be. That's painful for me to think about.

Or...

Or Mike could get his wish and become the Marine Corps Martial Arts Instructor in Quantico and we could ride out the rest of our years close to the fam.

You never know.

There are many possibilities and what ifs to consider when making huge life decisions such as this one. In the end, I think it will come down to following our hearts. Mike followed his heart when he decided to stop flying helicopters and I supported him 100%. Neither one of us regrets it now - even though it is the very decision - the very reason we are faced with this predicament today.

I do believe it will all work out how it's meant to in the end. In the meantime, we just have to decide how hard we want to fight for one outcome or the other. Or if we want to fight at all, and just let fate take over.....